Me, Myself & I

The World the way I see it

Dad, Can I Come Home?

Posted by Luminus on November 30, 2005

Dear Dad,
It is with great regret and sorrow that I’m writing you. I had to elope with my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with mom and you. I’ve been finding real passion with Joan and she is so nice-even with all her piercings, tattoos, and her tight Motorcycle clothes. But it’s not only the passion dad, she’s pregnant and Joan said that we will be very happy.

Even though you don’t care for her as she is so much older than I, she already owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. She wants to have many more children with me and that’s now one of my dreams
too.

Joan taught me that marijuana doesn’t really hurt anyone and we’ll be growing it for us and trading it with her friends for all the cocaine and ecstasy we want. In the meantime we’ll pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so Joan can get better; she sure deserves it!

Don’t worry Dad, I’m 15 years old now and I know how to take care of myself. Someday I’m sure we’ll be back to visit so you can get to know your grandchildren.

Your son,
John

PS: Dad, none of the above is true. I’m over at the neighbor’s house. I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than my report card that’s in my desk center drawer. I love you! Call when it is safe for me to come home.

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3 Responses to “Dad, Can I Come Home?”

  1. am afraid if your dad will ever want you back.

    hahahaha

  2. hadiza said

    it is really funny and i will like 2 read more pls.dad alway wat me beside him

  3. Oluola dada said

    hillarious

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